* I arranged to travel down to play a few days worth of acoustic music with a mandolin player I've known for a few years. I drove over to his at 11.30 for a 12.00 leave to the house where everyone was gathering. The mandolin player is a quiet sort of guy who occasionally makes very amusing comments. Little did I know. We finally left in his car at 2.30 p.m. and this guy after about 10 miles turns into Mr car monster. He seems to regard everyone on the road as having deliberately come out to impede his progress. Much F'ing and Blinding takes place. Once on the motorway it's straight into the third lane foot down and drives about 4 feet from the car in front. I quickly realise he is no respecter of speed limits as we cruise at 95mph behind a blue car. Mr mandolin decides the guy in front is reading at the wheel and develops an obsessive hatred of the man in the blue car.
Eventually we have the inevitable slow down to 40 mph as the traffic clogs up, my friend decides the man in the blue car is to blame despite my pointing out there a about 5 cars in front of him. Then we're down to 30 mph next 'bang' we rear end the blue car. All onto the hard shoulder out he gets and its a sweetness and light exchange addresses and insurance, he gets back in and its F'ing B***ard rage, rage, back into the third lane. I decide not to ask if it was deliberate in case it distracts from his driving. After about an hour he looks at the junction number, announces we missed the turn off two junctions back. Gets off and instead of returning down the motorway points at a name on a sigh post and announces our mutual friend lives near it. Off we go and arrive in a village with no sign of large town nearby. He pulls up at a pub and gets out. 'We'll ring him from here'. Sit in pub drinking pints, 40 mins later friend arrives and announces we're 25 miles away from his home. We convoy back to our destination just as the night is young. I desperately try to think how to avoid a trip back with Mr Road-rage, nothing comes to mind as my car is outside his house. Once in the house hello to all the boys and girls and mandolin man turns back into mild mannered Clarke Kent. I down some valium and eventually calm down.